On Prying My Fingers Loose

If anyone wills to do His will, he shall know concerning the doctrine… —John 7:17

If spiritual things seem dark and hidden to me, then I can be sure that there is a point of disobedience somewhere in my life. Intellectual darkness is the result of ignorance, but spiritual darkness is the result of something that I do not intend to obey. 

When Jesus drives something home to you through His Word, don’t try to evade it. If you do, you will become a religious impostor. Examine the things you tend simply to shrug your shoulders about, and where you have refused to be obedient, and you will know why you are not growing spiritually. (Oswald Chambers)

I can actually think of a time when I refused to be obedient to the Lord. I knew He was convicting me about an idol I had in my life. He whispered again and again in my ear that it was sin and it needed to stop. I loved my idol. I loved my idol more than any thing or anyone in the world. I knew it to be true...and I knew that I loved that idol more than I loved the Lord. I was afraid that if I confessed to the sin, then the Lord would ask me to get rid of the idol. I knew I wouldn't do that.

Needless to say that I wasn't really growing spiritually. When I was 19 and I left for college, the first thing I did was seek out Christian fellowship. I found that in Inter Varsity Christian Fellowship (IVCF). I signed up for the fall retreat which was at the end of September. It was there that I decided to rededicate my life to Christ. I wanted to take my walk with Him up on a different level. I prayed that the Lord would "Make me into a woman of God...no matter what it takes." Yes..I actually added the words at the end. I meant that prayer with all of my heart and decided to pray that prayer every day.

Guess what the first thing that the Lord needed to deal with was?......You got it! That idol in my life. And so began the process of the Lord prying my fingers loose on that idol. I wasn't going to give it up willingly. It was the most painful thing I ever went through.

So, my readers...don't do as I did all of those years ago (28). Take his words to you seriously. When you hear him whisper in your ear about something that needs to change..run to Him in obedience.